"I wish I was the one to give Michelle her black eye"*

Sorry for the delay, my lovelies.  The early, early shift, and a poor sleep Sunday night led to an early bed time last night.  I only got through about half before I admitted to myself that sleep was MUCH  more important.  So here is your update, started in drafts 'live' as the show aired, and completed today:

You're lucky ya'll mean so much to me, because it's taking everything I have to actually take my hands out from underneath the blanket to blog this (err, at least out of the arm holes on my awesome cozy throw!).  It's been frickin' COLD in the Maritimes the past few days.  We've had it lucky, for sure, but today with the windchill we were sitting at -33 Celsius.  I've been cold all day.  Anyway, I am here for a reason, so I'll get down to it...

• Seriously - HOW does one go to bed with no obvious bruises or contusions, and the next day, wake up with a black eye?  Jebus Brad, if she beats herself up in bed, you don't wanna be beddin' up with her.  Think of your safety, man!  (typed before her little threat about giving Brad his own black eye prior to commercial break, I might add).  SHE'S MENTAL!  MENNNNTAL!  Did she hurt herself on purpose to get Brad's attention/sympathy?  Perhaps it's strategically placed makeup??  Nothing would surprise me about that one.
• I'm liking Chantal.  I'm not convinced that Brad is good enough for her, but she'd be one of my final picks.  She's genuine.  They do seem to 'get' each other, too.
• It doesn't get any more special than a group date with a therapist, eh?  Better yet a therapist on the radio!  How many others do you think also cheated?  Hmmmm...
• He's so socially awkward.  It's ridiculous.  And the way he says, "Puleeeeeze", every second word still screams, "Don't hate me like the rest of America", if you ask me.
• Like I really, like, wish, like the word, "like", was no longer, like, socially acceptable.  I really think watching this show kills extra brain cells.
• Why must this show turn into Fear Factor? Can't they just go on regular dates to get to know each other?  Hey, maybe that could help the directors/producers come up with a 60 minute show of drama instead of taking another whole hour from our lives each week.
•  Did Meghan have a massive case of the trots? Or worse yet? Did she already mess herself?  Why else would she walk like that?  Tip for ya Meghan:  If you can't walk in heels - DON'T wear heels.  Then you won't have strangers question your bowel functions on a public blog.  You looked completely ridiculous. 
• Next week looks dramatic!  See ya then!

*Though I completely agree with this statement, I can't take credit for saying it, and I have to thank Ashley S. for the blog post title.