"Babe, welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You"*

Alrighty folks, it's episode 3 and we're heading to Rice-A-Roni-town.  Yes, I'm a day late with my update.  I didn't feel like watching it 'live' last night, opting instead for the snuggle-Dexter-watching time with Chris, and recording the episode so I can waste less than the slotted 2 hour interval tonight.

• Emily is treated to the first one-on-one date, testing her fear of heights. I think I'm repeating myself, but how does pitter pattering onself up to the top of a horrifically high bridge prove one's worth when it comes to love and relationships?  Oh right, it's all about tackling fears, and if they can tackle this, "Lord knows what they can tackle together", paraphrased Ben-ism. {Insert huge eye roll here}.  As much as I love Chris, there's no way on God's green EARTH , nor ANY amount of money in any BANK that would make me waltz up to the top of the San Fran bridge for him!  Sidenote:  Is it a good idea to describe your dating history as, "abyssmal", to try to impress a potential suitor?  Really?
• Skiing in 85 degree weather whilst wearing itsty bitsy teeny weeny bikinis is the perfect group date, no? Thank goodness there was some SUBSTANCE to the date, since I was beginning to think it was just a Honda CRV commercial.  Add in some insecurity with Kacie B (oh she shows her young age, doesn't she?), and the voluntary leaving of Brittney even after she was awarded the 2nd one-on-one spot (I think she just missed her Granny), and you've got a fait accompli!
• Onward and upward to the 2nd one-on-one date starring the darling runner-up Lindzi-with-a-zee (hey, at least it wasn't Courtney, right?)  And now I want ice cream.  Those friggers. A private concert at City Hall followed by dinner at a 1920's inspired bar seem to be the backdrops of some pretty decent dating time (yet I'm still craving ice cream). Beauty tip #2 for Lindzi: never pull your hair up or tuck it behind your gargantuan ears. Never.  Trust me. 
• I.still.hate.Courtney.  
• Soooo the 'surprise' visitor wasn't an old flame of Ben's trying to rekindle a lost dying ember after all,...but instead the funeral lady from Brad's season, Shawntel, who wanted her own shot because she was crushin' on Ben from watching last season.  Her introduction to the wolf pack was the best part of the show, though not to be outdone by the need for Erika's smelling salts and call for emergency personel. In all, I am happy with Ben's ultimate decision in letting Shawntel go, along with the other 2 he'd already picked to leave, sacrificing the final rose (oh, and Shawntel, the ugly cry, really?).  Had he kept Shawntel, I think the wolves would have been out for his flesh, anyway, along with Ben finding a pet on boil atop his stove.

And we're only 3 weeks in, folks. Yup.

Title courtesy of Lindzi's dump text.  Alternative title:  "Who's that Girl?", or "Scram, bitch!", or "It's a circus; it's a frickin' three-way circus" (the choices were ENDLESS, really)