And here we are, already at the hometown dates.
Lindzi-with-a-zee starts the night off and of course we're introduced to the real love in her life, and that is her horse. They discuss her vulnerability, and despite the fact that her makeup is extra cakey, they suck face before trotting onward to meet her family. The good Lord up above gave them a sign - they had their first date at the same location that her parents got married! Kismet??! All jokes aside, it was a very natural date, and everyone appeared to be super comfortable. Maybe it was the wine *shrug* (love the redneck wine glasses for the men, btw).
{Just when I thought her makeup couldn't get ANY worse, now I have to question not only the muddy foundation...but wtf is with that lipstick? She looks like she's been sucking on a sugar donut. Or maybe it was the marshmallows from the s'mores?}
Next up is Kacie B's hometown, complete with a welcome from a marching band, a baton-twirling Kacie B, and a sweet little love story about her grandparents that brought a tear to my own eye.
{I LOVE Kacie's cute little poncho jacket, don't you??}
Meeting Pa B. was outwardly awkward and uncomfortable. Mama B. wasn't much better. If he feels he can't get their approval, why would that change his decision? Ultimately, if he feels that she's the 'one', what does it matter what ANYone else thinks or feels?
{Jebus Freaking Chrisco, he needs a haircut. And soon. And maybe a degreasing treatment. Or - something. *shudders*}
Nicki and her skinny jeans greet Ben next, and they begin their date shopping for real-life cowboy boots and miscellaneous cowboy/girl accoutrements (the hat did NOT help the look of his hair. At all). The conversation between Nicki and her overprotective daddy made me miss my dad so much. And yeah, perhaps I even shed a tiny tear. There, I said it. I cried whille watching The Bachelor. Daddy gave his blessing and then Nicki again exclaims her love for him. Could the warmer reception he received at this homestead push her over Kacie B? Hmmm....
And finally, the "best" for last...we get to see where psycho-Courtney hails from... I love that her own mother doubted her feelings of love at first. However, despite the doubts her momma, and all of America might have regarding her intentions, and in her traditional "Fatal Attraction" fashion, she leads Ben to a quaint park setting where she arranged a 'mock wedding', complete with spontaneous handwritten 'vows', and they each describe their feelings toward one another. Gotta say, if she doesn't end up the final girl standing, America may have some big fists punch-ready for declaring some of the things he did declare. I suppose it could all be summed up as 'heat of the moment', right? (Oh, and I am in NO way, shape, or form supporting a Ben/Courtney tryst, union, or the like. Just trying to call it like I see it).
{Despite being back in her home soil, she still hasn't seen her esthetician}
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand he dog-gone went and took Pa B.'s advice, and let Kacie go. He fooled me too, Kacie. We can only wonder if the cool reception at the homestead had something to do with it? Or maybe the mock up wedding ceremony courtesy of Evil C? You should be proud of appearing very poised and graceful through your final walk out...too bad you had to let go in front of the camera and display what I can only say was this seasons worst 'ugly cry' yet - complete with drippy, black eyes. You'll find love some day, pet. Perhaps your daddy will even love him, too.
*Alternate post title: "What the F@#& happened??!!!"
2 comments:
LOVE your review of the show! And especially the little comments between paragraphs. Cracked me up! I say all these same things to my husband while we're watching. Nice to know someone else sees the same things!
Aww, thanks Julia! And thanks for reading! A little validation that I'm not the only one thinking these things is always nice. Feel good you can still spend some quality time with your hubby during the show. My fella steers as far away as humanly possible (well, aside from the occasional bikini scene he may happen to notice on his way from the kitchen). :)
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